How you doin?

How am I doing?…How can someone love their life so much and hate it some much at the same time? I love my home life. I am really enjoying being a mommy more than I ever thought I would. My husband is still my prince charming hero. I got promoted and am moving up the career ranks at J&J. We never have enough money but we really have nough to do the things we want to do within reason except buy a house but we’re working on that. My little fairy tale is only marred by the fact that I have to move at 90 miles an hour all day long just to keep my head above water. I’m finding that it’s a really big drag. I always have so much to do either at home or at work that I feel like I’m not really pulling my weight at either because I’m never just done. I feel so pulled in every direction all the time. Sometimes I really resent it. I guess that’s pretty typical of a first year career mommy though. I know it will get better. I’m hiring another jr accountant at the office to help me out. Melissa is turning one next Monday. She is getting more and more independent every day. I think she’s moving out to get her own place in few weeks. Mommy’s just keeping her down. haha

So how is everyone else out there doing today?

The blog needs something more upbeat from me

It’s getting too depressing. You would think that there is nothing fantastic in my life if you read my bleary blog posts. That’s not true at all. I just have a tendency to write it down when I’m waxing philosphical (rob says this is spelled right so send your letters to him if it’s wrong) or feeling bummed and not necessarily when I am happy. HOWEVER, let me say a few happy things now.

I fought the work load tooth and nail so I could take a week off. Oh my gosh I really needed the time off. I was really burned out. Ok, so I still had to do the sales taxes and home and run to the office today but hey it was only two hours of work, I didn’t have to be there to do it and I got to take Melissa to the office and show her off a little.

But I’m FREE!!! free free free. free to be me free to be mommy or may may as Melissa would say. hehehe

Yesterday on my first “official” vacation day we went over to visit “Uncle Murray” and “Auntie Bea”. AKA Janice’s parents. Of course Janice wasn’t home so cause it was a work day for the rest of you. We had a good time until Melissa decided it was nap time and had a small melt down before I flew out of there. I’m getting really good and the 2 minute grab and dash.

We had a great rest of the day to ourselves and when daddy came home we got to go to the super duper market. For those of you who don’t know, I am not allowed to make regular trips to the supermarket. I am an impulse shopper. We always spend a mint when I go with him. I buy lots of useful things though that Rob would never think to pick up. He ususally sticks to a list when he goes. The compromise: I go about once every three months. This way we can still experiment with new stuff once in a while but not go crazy.

Today, I dropped Melissa off at my dads and rented a steamer to clean my rugs. UGH you say?! “What? On you vacation?” I have to tell you it’s a tremendous load off to have that done. I haven’t done it since I went back to work from maternity leave.

They were bad. Worse than bad. I’m always amazed at how much better this room looks after I get them done. I also feel better about letting Melissa scoot around on them.

Let’s talk about Melissa again. This crazy girl is starting to take her first solo steps. She does better when she’s not thinking about it. She can do about two or three step now but not with any regularity. She can however cruise around table to get whatever prize is on the other side. She’s a fast one. Yesterday I took my eyes off of her twice. The first time I found her with her little tykes refrigerator shoved aside and up to her elbows in the fireplace ashes her hands black from soot. I had to laugh. The second time she scooted up right next to me while I was reading something online and the next thing I knew she had our checkbook torn up all over the living room. Our checkbook is a column ledger pad in a three ring binder. She’s our little disaster waiting to get loose. Today Melissa had a quiet protest. We put her in the pack n play so we could prep and eat dinner. She very quietly and methodically dumped every toy out of it except the two she could lift high enough to get over the top. She didn’t yell or whine. She just dumped everything out. It was hilarious.

She’s also starting to eat more big people food. She had meatloaf and mashed potatoes the other day. She’s also eaten in no particular order: vienna sausages, yogurt, toast with jelly, rice chex, cherrios, ground beef, ground turkey, cheese, pancakes, fried potatoes, various fruits, toddler finger foods, some grass from the yard and one register receipt. Other things we’ver tried to give her but they end up going over the side are pasta, green beans and broccoli. We naturally started using a splat mat for this reason. And since I cleaned the rugs we will continue to use the splat mat.

She’s also starting to say words. Again not regularly but today she at me, looked out the car window, pointed and said “tree”. And indeed there was a whole stand of trees right there. I’m thinking Princeton and scholarship for sure. I mean the kid said “tree”. She’s a genius already. Beauty and brains. She can’t lose.

We started planning Melissa’s first birthday party. I can’t believe she’s going to be one. It seems like I just finally figured out what to do with a newborn and now I don’t have one of those any more. (sniff) Now I have to figure out what to do with a toddler.

She really is my heart. I love her so. I love watching her experience new things and learn something that she didn’t know before. She’s so amazing. We are so lucky to have her. She’s makes me see things in a perspective I never had before. I wonder what we did to fill our time before she was here? Whatever it was, it wasn’t nearly this much fun.

I’m Blue today

My grandfather passed away last night. Services are Friday in Floyd. Va. Floyd is about an hour west of Roanoke,Va. We’re leaving Thursday morning so we can make the viewing Thursday evening. Heavy sigh. So much for my vacation. I really enjoyed the first day though.

Almost a year…

Hard to believe that our little girl is almost a year. Melissa is getting ready to walk on her own now – she cruises around the coffee table and the couch. She’ll even walk holding on to us with just one hand – and she can stand for a second or two by herself – but she hasn’t taken those first steps by herself just yet. Just a matter of time…

She is also feeding herself finger foods…finally…although I must admit I enjoyed feeding her because I knew exactly what made it into her tummy. Now we have to watch because half of it could potentially end up on the floor. We have been spoon feeding her some stuff – until she gets frustrated and wants to feed herself.

My Uncle George and Aunt Marica came out to visit yesterday while Melissa was at my parents’ – so I have some pics of that, as well as of her on Sunday on the swing with Grandpa Larry pushing her. Enjoy! I’ll still put up regular galleries of pictures – but it’s easier to get them up as things happen.

Attack of the crazy baby!
I love the swing.
Grandpa pushes her.
Uncle George reads to her
Aunt Marcia helps her play.
These are my Grand Aunt and Uncle!

–*Rob

Gamer Almost Has Books Confiscated at Staten Island Ferry Due To Inept Security Guard

I’m suffering from “Liberal Outrage Fatigue” – as The Onion so accurately and humorously put it.

This story of a gamer stopped on the Staten Island Ferry during the routine searches and being harassed for his D&D and other gaming books is just so…so….I cannot put into words the absolute gaping, open mouthed feeling that overcame me as I read the account.

This is what happens when you become overly paranoid, and put into place security without proper training or sensitivity. The security person apparently harassed him the first day – then the next day actually attempted to confiscate a gaming book from INSIDE HIS BAG claiming it was “inappropriate.”

I cannot stop shaking my head at this one. These incidents are far from isolated. This is Bush’s America – FUD at its finest. (That’s Fear, Uncertainty, Doom).

–*Rob